February 15, 2009

Choosing the Better Part

I've always been a doer. You know the one who is in the background getting things done. Folding up the chairs after a meeting, Sewing 26 pioneer bonnets for the Youth pioneer trek, Clearing the dinner dishes as soon as a meal is finished. I tend to get caught up in the details of life. I'm a list maker. No fun shall be had until the house is clean. My how things have changed! As I lay in bed or shuffle around the house, I am trying to learn to ignore the little things. The dishes in the sink will eventually get done. The floor will eventually get swept. It's hard! My kids and husband have really pitched in. When we had our fifth child a friend told us we needed to lower our standards (on clutter) and have a sense of humor. Well that advice seems to fit perfectly right now. I guess it won't kill anyone that my 13 yr old son had ice cream for breakfast the other day and my ten year old went to church without any socks on. What matters is that I am here and can hug them as they go out the door to school, and talk to them when they get home. I am learning to put things in prospective. I have always been like the woman in the New Testament. Martha and I are so much alike. Like me she worried about the little things. In Luke 10:42, Jesus speaks of one thing being needful: “And Mary hath chosen that good part, which shall not be taken away from her.” Have I chosen what is good, lasting, and eternal? Have I separated the trivial from the important? I am learning, as I go, to decide how I use my limited energy and what I worry about. It is a long process. We can learn from Mary and Martha to prioritize our lives-to put the things that are most important first in our lives. May we each gain an eternal perspective in our everyday lives and choose the better part. Love, Kris


Mel and Angus said...

Kris, it is funny that you were blogging about the Martha syndrome. My friend LaNice and I were just talking about the struggle we have being sometimes Mary but mostly a Martha. You are right, the important things are being there for your family. The other stuff gets taken care of eventually. Hang in there girl!

Rochelle said...

I LOVED your post. I am such a MARTHA TOO! I am finally beginning to understand that scripture better. Thank you for saying it so beautifully.

carolyn said...

Give yourself a few weeks. You'll be feeling better soon. Hang in there. Actually, enjoy yourself!

Nick and Amera said...

You are an aweosme example of how I should be. I wont go to sleep at nights untill my house is spotless...I get mad with little cars laying all over my house....or crumbs on the table from a sandwich.....I need to be more like you are and get a sense of humor and let it slide off my back. I see your point to a "T" I have a gift for you ive been meaning to bring over. I know I probably wont beable to see you, thats ok I completely understand. I will swing the gift by this week because I want you to have it. I love you so much and Im glad to hear you are enjoying being home with your darling family! I love you so much and admire everything abotu you! Keep on climbin!!!

Kyla said...

I love all of your Posts and you are so inspiring. I totally want to be a better person because of you. My husband enjoys being in young mens with your boys and they are such good boys! My daughter loves Miley Cyrus (Hannah Montana)and she has a new song out called "The Climb" I think you would enjoy the song. When I heard it, all i could think about was you and your family.

paige said...

I'm glad I finally got your blog address. It's so inspiring to read about your journey. You are a strong, spiritual woman!!! Our kids miss you dearly, and I kid you not, Trace prays for you EVERY NIGHT!

I know exactly how you feel about always doing things and having a spotless house...but in the end, it really doesn't matter if there were never any crumbs on your floor, but how many people's lives you've impacted. And, you have touched many! Thanks for keeping us updated throughout your journey.

Here's a note from Trace:

"Hope you're getting better. I love you Mrs. Kelly. Hope you can get feeling better in the summer." Love, Trace

Anonymous said...

I hope all is getting better for you!

I loved your Martha and Mary post. And while I love the idea that Mary chose the better role...that of being near Jesus...there is a much more important message that every person who reads this post should take away.

It's about attitude. Both (yes, both!) of these women were doers, but each of them chose what they would do and the attitude with which they would do it.

Martha, sitting at the feet of Jesus may have fretted about the dishes, the mess, when he would quit yammering on and on; because even as she did what she chose to do, she did it with a resentful spirit. She could have chosen as Mary did, she could have approached her chores with enthusiasm, but she didn't. She was resentful of her role. She had a very bad attitude.

Mary, on the other hand, did what she chose to do with a gratified spirit. She had her priorities in the right order, and knowing this, likely would have cheerfully completed the dishes later.

Jesus said, "Martha,...there is need of only one thing." Hmmm...what is that one thing? Dinner? A relationship with Christ? A good attitude?

It is also noteworthy for first century Palestinian Judaism that a woman would assume the posture of disciple at the master's feet. The fact that Luke includes this in his gospel should speak directly to us as women.

We are worthy of the message and promises of Christ. (Just as worthy as men!) He is there for us, if only we make him a priority.

Even when others (the Marthas) use (passive aggressive)tactics to disrupt our spiritual journey, we should remain focused on what is most important - God, and the spirit he sent to dwell in/with us.

You attitude is everything.

So remember, you are good enough because you are good enough for God. And even when the Marthas want you to do dishes and clean up after them, you can walk your own path without guilt, as long as you keep your priorities straight. And attitude is key in every chore you chose to do.

So, Kris, keep climbing the mountain. It is the chore you chose. (I know, I know, You may not have chosen cancer, but you have chosen your method of recovery!) Keep your priorities in order, and your attitude positive and you will find intimate favor with the Savior, just as Mary did.

PS IMHO, you are not a Martha, never have been, never will be, because you have always had the right attitude about whatever it is you are doing. Whether its teaching little kids, comforting friends or being a wife and mother. You have an amazing, active prioritzed spiritual life, and the best part is that you are willing to share it with others. Thank you, you amazing Mary.

Goobett said...

Kris-You are an Inspiration. I wonder if God gives these particular "trials" to people He knows can handle them in "His" way and in turn be an Inspiration and Inspire others. I don't have any words of encouragement, any inspirational thoughts, clever or funny things to say to make you smile or laugh...although I wish I did. I can't make this better for you...although I wish I could. The plain and simple truth is...this is hard. This is hard but I know you will get through it. All I have to offer you is my Love. Love in its purest, untainted, most authentic, genuine form. I am here for you for ANYTHING you may need...from the smallest gesture to the biggest favor. I am your servant. If it makes you smile or makes your life easier in even the smallest way I want to do it, for I am your friend...no expectations...no requirements. Just know this is here for you...if you ever need it. Sherry~

Jenn said...


I went back to Curves and heard about your struggles. Know that you're in my prayers, and that if there's anything you need, you can call, even if it is something as stupid as a bonnet pattern.

About the Martha syndrome, maybe we could form a support group with a hotline. (Help! I've swept the kitchen three times today and there's a CRUMB again!)

Have a great day, and keep your chin up. You're in good hands!

Fourteenth Year Cancerversary

              My husband and I at my 40th High School Reunion.                                                    Am I seriously that old?! ...